Fuck it! I'm getting away!

Hello dear reader! Well I got paid on Friday and all my money's just gone..by the time I'd paid for my rent, bills, my new PC, food...I am left with nothing dear reader, nothing! Sweet bugger all. Nada. Ingen ting! I'm fed up of being skint!
So what do I go and do to change my mind set dear reader? Yes, I go and spend more money on a hotel room in February in the Peak District!

"Fuck it!" I say to myself convincingly. I need to get some space and time for my mind to recouperate. Yes and "fuck it" I will indeed!

Indeed last year was one of the hardest years of my life! Granted I had barrels of fun and laughter but I also touched a passion so deep, that it's left me in a perpetual state of emptiness, longing and sadness. I don't know how long this state will be with me. I don't know whether this state is deluded but I feel it's true to my heart.

I also lost the one person in my life that gave me unconditional love - my Mother, which dear reader, I have already spoken about in earlier posts. I still don't quite believe she's not on the physical plane of life anymore.
However, I'm the sort of person that's able to keep going and maintain some sort of sanity amongst all the insanity that's been occurrent.

I'm gonna treat myself like a Queen for a day. Materially, I'm going to eat nice food, sleep in crisp, clean cotton sheets (although satin would be preferable). I'm going to drink red wine. I'm going to use room service.I'm going to put a cover over the T.V to block out reality! I'm going to think of no-one else apart from me. (supposedly!!)
On a more spiritual level I'm going to soak up the wonderful atmosphere that the lovely hills and the caves that lie beneath Castleton and Edale bring. I'm going to remind myself of how much I love this part of the world. It's energy and stillness is like a magnet to me.
There's something extremely peaceful about Edale. The fact that you almost never hear the hum of cars' engines. The fact that you're surrounded by a dramatic landscape. The fact that you hear waterfalls and streams running wildly in winter and calmly in summer. The fact that you feel at one with the world is truly exhilerating. There's also a magical feeling about Castleton, dear reader, with all of it's caverns, castle and the tiny cemetry perched out of eyes reach.
I know too, dear reader, when I return to the madness and manicness of the city, my soul will feel replenished and renewed from the pollutants that stagnate our minds.
So "fuck it" dear reader "fuck it"
I'm spent up, skint, brassic but who gives a shit when I've had the chance to taste a bit of nirvana for a day!