So, this weekend, it's official..I am truly free.
It's weird when I think about the last 3 years really. Meeting Beloved all of that time ago and telling him initially, that I couldn't keep in contact with him because of my home situation, even though he was adamant he wanted to see me again after we first met..and look where we are now?
Not even in contact..how tragic that time and circumstances change things. The irony that I'm as free as I wanted to be back then and indeed, over the past few years and yet, he's gone from my life. Of course all out of protection for my own heart.
I've had a strange and reflective weekend. I'm feeling like a lot of emotion has hit me all at once and has indeed, come crashing into me, on some level.
I still haven't sent his book back, I don't know why but I just have seemed so preoccupied recently..I will do it though although I'm unsure as to whether he's still moving away..seems his NYE was crap and I guess it's all to do with Gfriend stuff, who knows!
Anyway, time to seriously get my home sorted and my head sorted! I do feel positive but it must be said, I have an element of sadness entering my thoughts at times. I need to find some further interests I feel, away from clubs, away from pretentious situations and indeed meet genuine, good people again. Attract people who reflect who I truly am. The future is scary but I must look at it postively, I really must!
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2 comments:
I with you on needing a "head sorting" at the moment.
I'm really struggling with motivation, particularly at work but then that plays into other aspects of life. I feel like I've not achieved at work and let myself down, that depresses me and I then feel down about other aspects of life and a general lethargy takes over and it cycles down.
I'm finding it hard to climb back out of that.
I totally understand what you're saying, and feel the same way myself alot... you know, sometimes having to do with my old flame "Z". He ripped my world apart. Ten years and still I am haunted?? WTF???
Incidentally, have you read much about Twin Flames?? Just curious.
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